Hello I'am Meggan Welcome to my website.
Kid Quotables
Lessons learned as a 7th Grader…
Reilly: “Meggan, you were right…I did learn a lot as a 7th grader.”
Meggan: (Puffed with pride) “Reilly…good for you! What did you learn?”
Reilly: “Three things.”
Meggan: “Math, English, or Science?”
Reilly: “None of the above.”
Meggan: (uh-oh)
Reilly: ”I learned”…
1. “Don’t argue with 7th grade teachers because they are really tired and will pretty much always give you detention.”
2. ”Don’t get mad at your older brother and punch a wall, because you will break your hand and have to wear a cast that smells funny.”
3. ”Don’t light matches near a gas tank because it will piss all the adults of really bad and they will FREAK OUT and say you could burn the house down.”
Meggan: “Well as long as you learned something.”
Reilly: “I did! I can’t wait for 8th grade!”
Back Away From The Elmo…
Elmo is a rock star in this house, everybody loves him. An instance to score a personal cuddle with Elmo without interruption from a 2 1/2-year-old is a moment to treasure and protect. Benny was giving me the “back away from the Elmo stare.” I wouldn’t dream of interfering.
I Double Dog Dare You
A friend recently asked “what effects does pregnancy have on your body?” This required the putting down of the coffee. I didn’t really know how to reply. Sometimes a picture of a dog speaks a thousand words.
![lampard-poodle[1]](http://meggansamom.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/lampard-poodle1.jpg "lampard-poodle[1]")
The pre-birth vagina. Proud. Groomed to perfection, on point, able to do tricks, and ready for the show.
The post-birth vagina. Sad, shocked, and more than a little floppier than before.
![SharPei3[1]](http://meggansamom.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/SharPei31.jpg "SharPei3[1]")
The post birth stomach...no words necessary.
Mistaken Identity
While watching Sesame Street…
Me: “Lucas, look…IT’S BIG BIRD!”
Lucas: (points at television) ”MAMA!”
Me: “Ummmm, no Lucas that’s BIG BIRD.”
Lucas: “MAMA!!
Me: “BIG BIRD”
Lucas: “MAMA”
Me: “Lucas, Mama isn’t a big yellow bird. Mama is a tall person…not a tall bird. Mama is here, Big Bird is on Sesame Street on the television.”
Lucas: (pointing at television) “MAMA!”
Sigh…At least he didn’t mistake me for Oscar the Grouch. Silver lining.
TWO HOURS LATER
Harrison: “Hey Meggan, did you know that every time Lucas sees Big Bird on TV he says Mama. Like right now….”
Lucas: “MAMA!”
Harrison: “Awesome.”
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