Taco Bell Belly – You Have Met Your Match

Since I am now surrounded by all men I have noticed some striking differences in how men and women remember time.  Women, for instance, can tell you the major events of their lives by how much they weigh.  For example, I was 125 lbs., when I graduated high school.  I was 145 lbs. when I was dating So and So.  I was 160 lbs. after So and So broke up with me.  I was 150 lbs. at my friend’s wedding….I was 155lbs. at my friend’s second wedding.  Women can tell you their EXACT weight corresponding to any event in their lives.  For men it is not their weight, but their POOP!   They remember life’s events by the size and distinguishing characteristics of their craps.

Recently my step-sons were talking about a trip they had taken and they were having a hard time recalling the details…”remember we went waterskiing…no”, “remember the people camping next to us had that really cool dog with three legs and only one eye….no”,  remember I took that really big crap that wrapped around the toilet and then we took a picture of it to put on the internet…OH YEAH…that was a fun trip!”  One crap memory and it all came back like yesterday.  Men can use their poops as their emotional compass as well.  I once had a boyfriend that thought he could predict how well he was going to do on a test by the kind of poop he had in the morning.  “Oh no, not a good sign, it was just a pebble, looks like I’ll be getting a C+.”  Ask my boys about our road trip to Seattle this summer and they can tell you details of every dump across three states.

Which brings me to the next area of discussion, as the laundress of the house and viewer of many a skid row, I wanted to share with you my stain fighting combination that I think will combat any back door deliveries your husbands and sons might leave behind.  I have had great luck with the Clorox Bleach Pen and Spray and Wash’s MAX Resolve Power.  They have been my friend in the laundry room.  So let those boys eat cake, Taco Bell, curry…you are covered.  The men will always carry their memories with them, at least these products will help you remove those memories from their underpants.

*I did not receive a product sample or compensation for this post.  The views expressed here are my own.

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